Dear Journal

I am holding on to the friendship that we remained for the moment. Guess I couldn't have him so i am satisfied for having him as my friend. I would rather have him as a friend than losing him. I can't afford to lose him anymore. No matter how i try to forget about him, i just couldn't... there is something that i just couldn't let go. And no matter how i try to like someone, i only end up hurting myself.

I believe what we left was something that was hard to lose. I know I did the right decision breaking up with him last year... i was soo deeply hurt. I thought i could move on... Although, my friends in church helped me... i just couldn't lie to myself that there are times that i am missing him.

What i have now... I will hold on to it... I will wait... 'til God tells me when.