Dear Journal

What is it with Valentine's Day? Why is it such a biggie deal to most?

"I will always love you... No one can aver take your place..."

Why do you have to make promises when you don't intend to keep them? It only makes my heart break.

*sigh......

I was a sorta confidant to my best friend and to his girlfriend. Thanks for trusting me guys. I knew from the start that you two love each other so much, so, i never stopped praying for your relationship to be stronger than before.

Why do guys have to make some promises they don't even keep? Do you ever think how we even feel? I wonder what you've been thinking whenever you forget your word. I hate myself!!! I know i should've forgotten all about you but here i am trying to refresh my memory with those moments we shared 2 years ago when i went to your place. I know i did the craziest thing one could ever imagine... what can i say... i did it coz i love you. And here i am sitting... waiting ... for nothing ... i never saw how you love me. You never showed the ways. I hate you!!! Why did you even love me and taught me to love you back. Why did you let me love you more than anyone or anything in this world? I am suppose to forget all about you so i could have the guy God has been preparing for me here in my heart. But here you are still... deep in my heart... i could not even dig to let it out... It's has been a stain that never comes out. Aarrggghh!!! you probably are out there enjoying with some ladies... It's but unfair sometimes... guys can easily recover when girls don't.

I was reading our chat history... i was reading those emails that i sent and those emails that you sent. It only breaks my heart into pieces. I have to let go of you... but how?! I wanted to forget you... but how?!

*sigh........... T_T